March 13 - OPEN AN UMBRELLA INDOORS DAY

Actually, it is also National Jewel Day.  Pfft!  Who on earth submitted that to be a national holiday?  Jewelers?  Forget it.  I am going to go with (and I am not making this up -- hi, Julie) ... it is freaking national OPEN AN UMBRELLA INDOORS DAY.  Yay!!  Superstitions be ding-danged, right before a lucky holiday like St. Patty's Day, the powers that be (again, whoevertheyare) are giving the general public the liberty to ... well, FEEL liberated! So, dude.  open those umbrellas.  Prance around your office like Gene Kelly would have done had he had the cajones to open an umbrella indoors.  Are you a school teacher?  Prance down the hall; I just dare ya.  Are you in a cubicle?  Go into the bathroom, flush the toilet, and prance out with your parasol.  Go to each co-worker and with your best dirty Harry impression say, "Feelin' lucky, punk?"  and open it up with panache.  I think I love this holiday.  Forget luck, you're blessed.  Right?  Riiiiiight?????  RIGHT!!!!!!!!