Mar 27 - Quirky Country Music Song Titles Day

Let's just get this out of the way now.  Some of my family and really good friends know this, but I don't just throw it out there.  I live in Nashville and I am not at ALL a fan of country music.  I deeply appreciate the artists - the performers and the writers - shoot, some of them are my good friends -- but really and truly, I am just not a fan.

When I first moved to Nashville a friend said to me that I could not live here without loving country music eventually ... to which I responded, "Watch me."  And that wasn't even a challenge because I actually went to concerts and started listening to it to get used to it, like it, and maybe eventually start listening.

This failed.

I even appreciate that most tell a really good story.  *sigh*

Okay, so, even though these quirky song titles can be a humourous giggle, it is not why I am not a fan of this music genre.  Some artists have no southern drawl and some tend toward a rock country style and that's fine and all, but no offense to country music.  I'm sorry!!  I tried, really.  I think it's okay that it just still is not my preference.  I like U2, classic rock, jazz, and showtunes.  My bad.  I have lived here for over 10 years.  Maybe there is still hope for me?

That being said, here are some of the quirky song titles that make me giggle snort a little.  Okay ... A LOT.

On Lost Love:

If Whiskey Were A Woman, I'd Be Married For Sure
If You Leave Me, Can I Come Too?

I Gave Her the Ring, and She Gave Me the Finger 

I'd Rather Pass a Kidney Stone than Another Night With You 

If You Can't Live Without Me, Why Aren't You Dead?

How Come Your Dog Don't Bite Nobody But Me?
Billy Broke My Heart at Walgreen's and I Cried All the Way to Sears

All the Guys that Turn Me On Turn Me Down 

At the Gas Station of Love, I Got the Self Service Pump 

I Can't Pass the Bar, and There's One on my Way Home

On Cheating Hearts:

Don't Squeeze My Sharmon. (yes, that IS the correct spelling) 

I've Been Flushed From The Bathroom Of Your Heart 

I Still Miss You Baby ...  But My Aim is Getting Better 

If I Can't Be Number One In Your Life, Then Number Two On You 

Mmm, Sorta Spiritual:

Drop Kick Me Jesus (Through The Goal Posts Of Life)

I've Been Roped And Throwed By Jesus In The Holy Ghost Corral

I Don't Care if it Rains or Freezes 'Long as I Have My Plastic Jesus Sittin' on the Dashboard of my Car 

I love these.  Some are absolutely hysterical.  I even looked for another common country music theme which is ... dogs (besides ones about love defensive biting dogs as in the first group).  But thank HEAVEN there are no stupid titles about dogs because most all of them are about, yes, dead dogs.

I could not remember nor find a quirky country song that's just about love.  Except for one jewel: Get Your Biscuits In The Oven, And Your Buns In The Bed  *snort!*

Oh, there are  more, people.  WAY more.  Anyway ...
SO.  If you wanted to write a funny country song title about one of these topics, what would it be?